Doctor : I regret to tell you that you have a brain tumor.
Mr. Bean: Yesss!!! (jumps in joy)
Doctor : Did you understand what I just told you?
Mr. Bean: Yes of course, do you think I'm dumb?
Doctor : Then why are you so happy?
Mr. Bean: Because that proves that I have a brain!
2) MR. BEAN WHILE IN GRADE SCHOOL:
Teacher : What is 5 plus 4?
Mr. Bean : 9
Teacher : What is 4 plus 5?
Mr. Bean : Are you trying to fool me, you've just twisted the figure, the answer is 6!!
3) WHILE IN A DRUG STORE:
Mr. Bean: I'd like some vitamins for my grandson.
Clerk : Sir, vitamin A, B or C?
Mr. Bean: Any will do, my grandson doesn't know the alphabet yet!!
4) AT AN ATM MACHINE:
Friend : What are you looking at?
Mr. Bean: I know your PIN no., hee, hee.
Friend : Alright, what is my PIN no. if you saw it?
Mr. Bean: four asterisks (****)!
5) MARRIAGE:
Friend : How many women do you believe must a man marry?
Mr. Bean: 16
Friend : Why?
Mr. Bean: Because the priest says 4 richer, 4 poorer, 4 better and 4 worse.
6) CHATTING WITH HIS FRIEND:
Friend : How was the tape you borrowed from me, is it Ok?
Mr. Bean: What do you mean ok, I thought it's a horror film. I didn't see any picture.
Friend : What tape did you take anyway?
Mr. Bean: Head Cleaner.
7) DEATH OF HIS MOTHER:
Mr. Bean:(crying) the doctor called, Mom's dead.
Friend : condolence, my friend.
(After 2 minutes) Mr. Bean cries even louder
Friend : what now?
Mr. Bean: my sister just called, her mom died too!
8) MR. BEAN ATTENDING A MEETING:
Colleague : Sorry I'm late. I got stuck in an elevator for 4 hrs because of a power failure.
Mr. Bean : That's alright, me too...I got stuck on the escalator for 3 hrs.
9) SPELLING LESSON:
Mr. Bean's Son: Dad, what is the spelling of successful....is it one c or two c?
Mr. Bean : Make it three c to be sure!
very lame..lols..
Think U're Clever?
Below are 4 questions. Answer them instantly. You
can't take your time.
Answer them immediately. No pencil or paper! OK?
Let's find out just how smart and clever you really
are. Ready? ... GO!!!
FIRST QUESTION: You are participating in a race.
You overtake the second person.
What position are you in?
ANSWER: If you answer that you are first, then you are
Absolutely wrong! If you overtake the second person
And you take his place, you are second! Try not to
Screw up in the next question.
To answer the second question, don't take as much
time as you took for the first question.
(You know you took too much time.)
SECOND QUESTION: If you overtake the last person, then
you are...?
ANSWER: If you answered that you are second to last,
then you are wrong again. Tell me, how can you
overtake the LAST person?!
THIRD QUESTION: Very tricky math! Note: This must be
done in your head only. Do NOT use paper and pencil or
a calculator. Try it.
Take 1000 and add 40 to it.
Now add another 1000.
Now add 30.
Add another 1000.
Now add 20.
Now add another 1000.
Now add 10.
What is the total?
ANSWER: Did you get 5000? The correct answer is
actually 4100.
Don't believe it? Check with your calculator! Today is
definitely not your day. Maybe you will get the last
question right?
LAST QUESTION: Mary's father has five daughters:
Nana, Nene, Nini, Nono.
What is the name of the fifth daughter?
ANSWER: Nunu? Nana? Nene? NONO! Of course not. The
fifth daughter's name is Mary.
Read the question again.
lols..yea stupid emails..
my kids =) lols..
yesterday i worked full shift..i was bored to death in the earlier part...yea because steph, 89 din come..ya lor..so i jus stood there lor..lols..but somehow i realised i rreally like service..seeing customers smile i felt a surge of satisfaction..LOL sounds stupid but its real! lols..
yea and yesterday was my 1st time to Great world city..lols..u know the name..GREAT World..it mus be great..lOL..we (cacai, michelle and me) went by cab..lols..to take the coleslaw..abit stupid leh..lols..why chose me..lols..everytime i gt one leg in something new..lols..
making of ice tea, bringing the shutters, throwing the garbabge and going to great world to collect goods..lols..and yesterday was just my 4th or 5th day? lols..it was great though..learnt lotsa stuff..lols..
im glad they taught me actually..lols..
yea yea..michelle, peishan, and leanne are nice..lols..leanne is a very zai and steady malay..lols..i wanna learn from her..lols..very steADYYY and cool..lols..yet very friendly when u know her..lols..
and she's very pretty! lols..
hha yea..so actually yesterday was al-right. and gt few customers were really happie about my service..gt one table i remembered very clearly..lols..they were playing true or dare and they were served by me..lols..
they v funnie lor..they dare a girl to give flower to the indian lady who came to takeaway some food..lols..all of us stunned..lols..especially de indian// when did kenny gt staff giving away flower? and they took our flowers..lols..
and one more is to take contact from the uncle..lols..it was quite bad to tease him..yea..shouldn't have done that..
anyway..that uncle also dunno what they are doing man..more blur than me..lOl
yea the group left// and one girl came back and thank me for the serive...LOL..i quite stunned..lols..and happie la..haha..yea lor..and that..erm what's his name..i always call him 'tong ju mi you' (means living together mate) cos he lives together with peishan!! lols..and they are only 18!! lols..no la..actually gt 3 ppl staying together..but i always tease them..WHAha..okok continue..and he saw! lols..he was so stunned..'WOW gt customer came back especially to thank you ar..' haha..
yea yea..lols..
and what's more.. dun even remember alrd..lols..and im not tired..after work..its only that my legs ached like mad..lols..and it rained..actually..abit la..i hate raining and cloudy days..ya lor..sad days to me..LOL>>>>>
and i broke a bottle of chili during closing..few customers saw la..lols..luckily i din panik or something..lols..my colleagues helped me to clean de floor..lols..they v nice right..lols..
ya lor..i learnt not to be clumsy and panicky..lols..once i tot nti can help me overcome this..but now i realised..i did not chn taht time..yea lor..it doesn't help and it really makes me depressed..haha..shouldn't be saying this~~ anyway..
i almost slipped and fall serveral times..and i remembered one customer seeing me...ALMOST SLIPPED..and he was saying..is this an entertainment??' DOTSSSS...OF COS ITS NOT right..LAMMMERRRR...
and i was like..er..hahahaha no la..
yea lor..and it was quite sian to go home alone..=/
but xuejuan the china girl is very nice also..haha..iyea lor..
the floor is sippery because of the rain..cos i jus clung on to her when i walked..lols..slippery leh my shoess..can fall anytime..LOL
den the MARS was like..walking past us saying goodbye..Dots..we stunned..this time is really stunned..cos we were saying about the manager// quite bias..lols..and all la..lols..i hope he din hear that..and we din even know his presence until he walked past US?? it couldn't be..because i din see anyone behind us..i checked alrd..and din see anyone else..that;'s why i was so stunned!
haha..that's all i can remember for yesterday..lols..and i finally drink my fac green tea yesterday..LOL..FINALLY MAn..haha..=)