mixed emotions
Monday, March 19, 2007 @ 3:50 PM
yea. aha.
sometimes human are weird creatures. hahah. i can be so optimistic sometimes. but there are times when im just so
lost.
i picked up the call this afternoon and spoke to one of the nurses from SGH.
transplant. hmmm. my mum told me shes afraid.
and sometimes i jus feel so helpless. pretending that im okie. its nothing. actually.
its not that i don care. its jus that i really dunno what to say.
im so afraid to show her my anxiety. yeas. shes alrd so frightened hw can i put more pressure on her. its been so long. and sometimes im really afraid that someday i will explode.
sometimes i really feel like crying~ whenever i heard that she needs to go through those hardships and surgery. but i got to grow up isnt it?
yeas. we need to be stronger. yet sometimes im jus avoiding the problems.
pretending nothing happened. everything will be okies.
seeing my parents. i really dunno what to say.
im afraid of saying what i shouldnt say.
i dunno whats happening to me.
i dunno what cause the changes in me towards my mum.
i shld be more caring.
i shld be more cheerful.
its really hard to put what u think into action.
but we need to try right?
okies. should stop crapping. hahah.
i will be fine!!
haha. btw i jus ran across this
"today is a gift. thats why its called present"
something like tt la huh hahaha. yeas. we are alrd fortunate right hahah.
keep on trying!! you will never know what you will get at the end of the day!!
if the results doesnt seem as good but its okie because at least you tried!!
haha okies i shall stop ranting!
hope i can gain my voice by tml!!! sickening weather!! lols